Crankypants in March Snowsplatter

Posted on March 4, 2011

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You may have noticed a paucity of news recently.  That is because (1) the new little camera is dead and (2) the car is behaving badly and (3) even the coffeemaker and the oven are refusing to cooperate.  There is only one thing to do under the circumstances.

OK, there are many things to do, and I have been doing them while the Duo slept. Package up the corpse of the new little camera to be sent off to its maker. Arrange the transport of the near-corpse of the car to Mike’s Urgent Care Center for Ailing Autos. Explore the limitations of the toaster oven. Make coffee the way they did in 1870. Spend the balance of the morning flossing away coffee grounds.

Experiment with the old little camera, which I have to shoot blind. Thus the Duo, caught in the act of snoozing on the sofa, Miss Sadie with her head on my very own reading pillow. (It was still warm. I just finished Pat Conroy’s My Reading Life, which is a beautifully made book filled with exactly the sort of stampede of language you’d expect.)

I can hear the pattering of little snowflakes on the deck. That is a very bad sign. Snowflakes are supposed to be silent. When they patter, they splatter. They freeze in a thin layer and pretend to be normal snow even though they are slipperier than a Wall Street financier slinking off with his bonus. Even YakTrax are hard put to master March Snowsplatter. I hate pattering snow.

We are “supposed” to have Unseasonably Cold Weather for the next couple of weeks, which is unfortunate, as the maples are all ready to give up their sweet sap. More about that if I get the car back. More Crankypants Reports if I am limited to walking distance in snowsplatter.

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